beck, mongolian chop squad, mcs...

been quite a while since i'm crazy over a manga title. it's pretty old title, but the storyline is really good. ok, i may have drooled over the guitars (freaking PRS CU22, Gibson SG, Gibson Les Paul, Gibson Les Paul with 7 bullet holes, Gibson ES335, Fender Stratocaster, Fender Telecaster, ESP Signature models which i dun remember well, some fubar brand called Tibson Les Paul, CF Martin D-45, Gibson Thunderbird, Ernie Ball Stingray and my fav, Gretsch White Falcon.). the storyline got juice too! about this indie band called beck, named after the band leader's stitched up dog, that all the major labels are asked to not approach them by the president of some company or something. it's pretty good, reading them going on tours and how the leader kept going around being a wuss. most of all, how an average boy learnt and play the guitar in the band and how he loved his guitar. it's bananas!

after reading so much, i thought that being in a band is tough, but hell, just play, who cares? it's time to head out, qiang qiang and i will be hitting some local gigs to rekke and see the scene out there. it's pretty stagnant and biased the last time i went to watch local band play, indie and more indie, if not it's some emo rock shit, so need to see about it now.

roar! DO MY TEST! ROAR!

drums again...

there are a few reasons why i do not wanna play drums for anything. but still, i played today. For GOD! FOR THE WIN! even though it's refreshing and have very minimal mistakes, or rather only 1, that i could think, i still dun think i'm in for drums. it's weird. and there's so many ppl wanna learn how to play the drums.

i don't like it, especially teaching someone playing drums. i do not know where i'm going. i do not know whether i'm going too fast or wat. and one thing about it is that, subconsciously, i feel that ppl are taking it very lightly, kinda like coz it's cool, that's y i learn. or, it dun need to know the notes so it must be easier to learn. similar to bass, "oh, just play the note to substitute the chord can liao, very easy." i'm disappointed. i'm disappointed especially with the sentence, "i'm selling my guitar now coz i'm going to concentrate on bass." or the other way. it's sad.

i'm lost now, i'm not too sure wat is my main instrument. my mind told me it's the guitar, but the other skills are more in demand. church needs bass. i hardly play guitar except for cell. scc need bass and guitar, i hardly play drums coz the ppl scared of me. wat the shit. and all the ppl there aren't improving except winnie. i've been observing, it's winnie that's improving dramatically. sheisser.

saturday... lol...

it's saturday already. a bum day i guess. managed to treat my family to crystal jade today. eat until bth. kinda quite alot of food but actually not that alot. the beef stew and broth is still stuck on my taste buds, every burp, i'm still able to savour the taste of it. it's a pretty good meal with a pretty ok price. 60 bucks for 3 bowls of ramen, 1/2 chicken, 2 sets of 5 xiao long bao, a set of spring roll and ice lemon tea (stupid brother).

i'm thinking of writing chinese songs. i dun have the mood, or rather the knowledge to write it yet. come, save me God.

valentine's...

never talk to me about valentine's day. i guess this year's will be the same as the previous years and the years to come. it's a taboo. it's like a day where all the prices will jack up 3 times and sad people will stay home and bite their fingers. their parents will go, "boy, why no girlfriend?", which snaps an artery. all the hey hos about the new year died down, but valentine's is still ahead. freakish people that is ever obsessed with this day will start planning and asking for a date. i'm in despair. i'm broken.

no once that i asked her out happened. so i concluded that she will not want to go out. the idea of having valentine's day and globalised it as a day that love love thingy, IS WRONG! it's depressing my friend.

i was looking at threadless. their shirts are kinda cool, to me that is. hmm. i wanna order leh, anyone wanna share the shipping cost with me? we can buy together. usual prices for a shirt is 15 for guys, 17 for girls and gays. long sleeve is 25 and 27 respectively. 40 for hoodies. well. anyone?

sick... happy?

i'm sick. shit. i've got work piled up and i'm sick. in office now, as usual, blogging in the morning till approx 8am before going ahead with my work.

felt better now, as in my emotions calmed down alot. i can think better now, and perhaps the 10th time telling myself to forget about her. all my attempts to ask her out for movie/shopping/walking around failed. perhaps it's just no hope masking under her usual business. i dun want it to be an obligation or reluctance. since the signal's up for, "get away from me", i guess i'll accept it. no harm done. i'll just closed this heart of mine like the usual past. i guess fairytales are just fairytales, a toad can never get a swan.

goodbye.

reality, i've got work to do...

i really do need someone to punch me in the gut and shout at me and just beat me up till i'm near dead. it's getting too wild to control.

i'm 20 this year, and she's 20. fact one for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
after ns, i'm 22. after university, i'm 25. i'm old by then and she'll be working already and i'm lagging behind.
i'm fat, she's gorgeous. fact two for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
where can you find a fairytale in this world? no swan wanna hold hands with a toad.
i'm boring. fact three for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
look at my schedule. work, home, play guitar, sleep. i don't like much activity.
i don't speak chinese often to outsiders. fact four for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
chinese kind of fit her and i'm not chinese chinese.
i'm a christian. fact five for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
it's against my faith.
i get jealous very very very easily. (haha, you didn't know that right? haha) fact six for no chance of chasing her.
ask why? reality time!
i'll most probably hurt her because of being over protective.

sigh. God, save me. i need to move on.

happy new year, lads...

the best thing that could happen on new years day is to sprain my left ankle. sigh. i guess no badminton for me for approx 3 weeks and gotta walk around in my track shoes.
headed down to scc ch yesterday night for the countdown, was planning to head down to wee wee's at 10.30pm to join darren and wee wee for count down and have some drinks. well, the clubhse kinda attracted me to stay. been a long road, i guess. not all members can sustain for 3 years in the club. 100 year ones and filtered to around 20 and now it's around 10, and i'm one of the existing members. i dun loathe for not being in the committee, i guess staying as a normal member is cool. it's a difficult position to be in and is constantly being criticized for misjudgment, lousy decisions and procrastination. so in a good thought, being normal is good. i'm like an outcast now, feared in scc, but i like being spaced out from too many people, makes me clear.
the night was quite unpleasant though, but dominating the couch was pretty awesome. yup, i slept on the couch but i did a light sleeper, still using my ears and being alert of my surroundings. it's weird to hear your own snores, haha. super paiseh, i snored. ha.
got up fully at 7am, and started to stare at the scenery outside just out from the door of the clubhouse. it has never been to satisfying to grab a view of where i've been for the past 2+ years. also felt quite sad that i'm going to leave somewhere that i've really enjoyed my education for a higher level. was tough, but it's essential. qy was in a green jacket staring at birds, so i joined her, who was further down the corridor. she's in her drunk mode. heard from her that is rare, but yeah, my 2nd time seeing her being in that mode. chatted up with her about birds. unknowingly, we hit education. i knew it's not a topic that's super unappealing, and for some reason, talking to her will lead to that. i don't think she's very interested in discussing it and i'm trying to steer it away. well, it didn't happen.
went for breakfast in in mac and i diced my pancakes, resulting in becoming the last to finish it. haha. wan ting was the 2nd last. hahaha. zhi wei was complaining over why am i so slow and constantly telling me that he could give a hand on the sausage right next to my pancakes. haha, it was amusing while i kept reminding the crowd, "It's the passion.".
just got up from my long sleep after hitting home at 1. i had my dinner.
happy new year, lads.